Insomnia

One of the many parting gifts that chemo left me with is the inability to sleep.

  I have developed some pretty wicked RLS (restless leg syndrome) due to the anemia that came from chemo, and I simply cannot lie still in bed no matter how hard I try. 

 So at night I can be found prowling the house, trying to tire out my legs so I can sleep.

Right now it is 12:40 am and I am again on my nightly prowl and thinking about tomorrow.

Tomorrow marks the beginning of my seven weeks of radiation.

I will go everyday Monday through Friday and then get Saturday and Sunday to recover before hitting it again.

Yay.

I am trying to have a positive attitude about this. Really. I am.

I know it puts me one step closer to being done with treatment, and I am grateful this technology exists,

blah, blah, blah.

 But once again there are real side effects--some for now and some that may appear later down the road.

Add to that the cording that I have developed in my right arm, and I am just having so much fun.

Plus I get to wear a lovely compression sleeve for about three hours everyday during the process.

Yay.

No one told me that this stage of treatment should be called the stage of never-being-at-home-because-you-are-always-at-a-doctor's-office.

Last week I had 4 appts and this week I have 5.

I see my oncologist, my surgeon, and my radiologist on a regular basis. (I never thought I would use the word "MY" in front of any of those doctors in this lifetime!) Also every three weeks  I  get herceptin, and I have physical therapy for the cording twice a week.  Add to that  occasional other tests like an echo cardiogram to make sure my heart is still beating, and you get a pretty full schedule.

Evidently the main side affect of radiation is fatigue.  Goody.  Guess what happens when fatigue and insomnia and endless appointments collide?

I don't know but I'll keep you posted.

I know that I am whiny tonight, mostly because i would rather be sleeping,

but in all actuality, life is pretty good.

My energy is up and I have started to cook for my family again

 which makes me very happy.

We have squeezed a few short trips in to the lake and this weekend we are sneaking off to Atlanta to catch a Braves game.

Tonight in our family prayer, Lydia prayed that I would not be discouraged about the way I look.

Haha.

I told her not to worry, that all things considered, I thought I was looking pretty good!

And all complaints aside, 

I know that I have been greatly blessed throughout this whole process.

I continually experience tender mercies from a loving Heavenly Father

 and am still being showered with love and support from all sides.